From the mouths of babes
So I'm walking in the corridor at work. Its 1 a.m. or something like that. Cute chinese rotation student comes around the corner and I bump into her.
Me: "Oh sorry, didn't realize anyone else was working this late."
BY: "Wow! You work so hard! You're here all the time."
"Not really. Well, you know, the experiments."
"You must have a lot of papers."
"Huh?"
"Publications."
"Umm. Not really."
"You must have at least four or five papers by now."
"Umm. wrong."
"How many do you have?"
"Just one, actually."
"Ooh. What is it? Cell? Science? Nature?"
"No, no and No. Its actually a JBC paper."
"Oh!?" (she looks confused. And a little disappointed.) "But then why do you work so much?"
"Hmm I don't really know."
And then I cried.
Me: "Oh sorry, didn't realize anyone else was working this late."
BY: "Wow! You work so hard! You're here all the time."
"Not really. Well, you know, the experiments."
"You must have a lot of papers."
"Huh?"
"Publications."
"Umm. Not really."
"You must have at least four or five papers by now."
"Umm. wrong."
"How many do you have?"
"Just one, actually."
"Ooh. What is it? Cell? Science? Nature?"
"No, no and No. Its actually a JBC paper."
"Oh!?" (she looks confused. And a little disappointed.) "But then why do you work so much?"
"Hmm I don't really know."
And then I cried.
posted by khal at 6:28 am
7 Comments:
Obviously you work so much to increase your chance of bumping into hot chicks.
Although technically the more scientific approach would be to spend most of your time in nightclubs in a drunken state.
JBC is a good journal.
This groupleader here is pushing out nature/science papers like it is nothing.
I checked out though which of his papers are cited most. It's a paper in Mechanisms of Development. Impact factor 4. It's cited 30 times a year.
His first science paper comes further down the list with 10 cites per year. All other nature/science papers hover around 4/5 per year or much less.
There is a moral message in here somewhere, but it is so ugly I am not going to utter it.
Your links don't work properly btw.
I cried not because I didn't publish in the holy trinity (CSN) but because this is what it seems to be reduced to.
I see this over and over again. Its like a trophy you should have to justify your existence as a scientist.
I think JBC is a good journal. And my paper was a damn good paper, I'm very proud of it. Even the few fuckwits I work with that barely speak to me have it printed out in triplicate and underlined and highlighted in various parts.
Fixed links btw, tx.
Krebs and Fischer's Nobel papers were in JBC.
Yay. I'm going to win a Nobel.. pause... not.
Did you try the sucrose gradients yet? Do you want me to make a video of how to pour?
oooh the condescension! You are ready to be a postdoc, man!
Student: how do you do that?
Postdoc: You're doing it all wrong, idiot! This is how you do it.
PI: Look - why isn't it done? Just do it!
Demigod PI: Wait, who are you?
Kinda need to find a centrifuge first. And I need to kiss a few asses before I'm allowed to go ask for a pump. There are no biochemists on this floor.
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